


The Village Idiot

by Kissa



Series: Looking In [3]
Category: Actor RPF, Marvel Cinematic Universe RPF
Genre: F/M, Happy Ending, Love, Romance, unpopular choice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-24
Updated: 2018-06-24
Packaged: 2019-05-28 00:17:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15036503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kissa/pseuds/Kissa
Summary: Chris has met someone who completes him, but who is not to everyone else's liking. He can choose his own happiness without any issue, but everyone else and their dog has an opinion and they're not in favour of whom and what Chris chose.





	The Village Idiot

**Author's Note:**

> Chris has referred to himself as "the village idiot" re: his childhood teeth. So I use that phrase lovingly, don't get mad over it.

Be a kid, grow up, get a career, do awesome stuff, settle down, have kids, watch them grow up and get careers - that’s what you do, right?    
  
I was so convinced this would be me. It might still be me. But that despair I had to get there already is gone.    
  
I have a girlfriend now and ever since it got out, all hell broke loose.    
  
My actor friends are like “wtf?” and disapprove openly, to my face. There are a few exceptions, people I’ve always known not to be huge bags of dicks. 

Ma was worried for me, but only until he met her. Now they’re best-best friends. 

The press went bonkers - and so did the fans.    
  
It’s always with the tired tune of I’m a vulnerable, sad lonely man who fell victim to an evil woman who’s after my money and my soul. 

The truth is she’s a more iconic actress than I ever tried to be. Her own haters and stans respect her. It’s just my stans that feel a fire under their asses to go after her because their fave is off the market and it ruins their fantasies to think of me getting some from a woman that’s not them.

But I couldn’t care less.    


I don’t know what it was that drew me to her. I knew her from horror movies and dark fantasy ones, where she is this long, tall, hauntingly white presence, her dark or white robes swishing menacingly in the wind. She usually moves in such a way that you forget that’s a human, acting.  

Then, to meet her up close in real life and to find out she’s an even bigger weirdo than me? Almost zero mind to mouth filter, takes no shit from anyone, is perfectly content in her world and you just have to wait to be seen by her.   
  
It was a bit of a shock at first. We did things the other way around.    
  
We had sex first and while I went into it with the confidence and élan of whisky, feeling indeed like someone hot who knows what they are doing - it became so clear , so early that she’s in charge.    
  
The way she whispered in my ear, her lips caressing as they slid downward, over my neck; the heat I felt pooling in my lower belly when she looked at me - usually I see women mentally compare me to what they’ve seen in movies and magazines or to what they’d like me to be and finding me lacking. It all awakened parts of me I didn’t even think of bringing into sex.   
  
She was very interested in finding ways to make me melt - with her eyes on me, with her words and with her hands on my skin. I have seriously not felt truly grown up before her, always worried I’d be found out as someone who is only acting like they have a clue what the hell they’re doing to other people sexually.

Who would have thought the horror movie lady would have superpowers in the sack? A fetish at best would have been my guess.   
  
When I left her, I could barely remember my own name and I was feeling strange in my body. Not a bad strange. New strange. I only knew I wanted more. 

I did my best to be with her as much as our often conflicting schedules allowed, but I never felt any pressure or expectations. Never did she start with “we need to talk” or “what are we?”, the two phrases I dread to hear the most.    
  
She came to see me on sets and on press tours and I loved that so much. She brought me my favourite ice cream from home and for the first time in ages I was sitting gingerly in the press room, feeling pleasantly fucked out and giddy. People were gonna think I was drunk again, but that’s on them.    
  
It feels great to sit on this epic secret. In a way, it’s sad that I don’t get to talk to anyone about how happy I am and how good I am feeling, but it’s not on me that people are assholes who can never just be happy for me and accept my choice of partners.

Ma asked me if we’re getting married. Who knows. I’d love to. I’m still scared though. She lives at a different speed than me, she can annoyingly see the future much more clearly than I do and she doesn’t want kids. 

We’re so good together, but should I try to change her mind? Should I just walk away from the closest to a soulmate I’ve ever had or should I just enjoy our shared life with all it brings (and doesn’t bring)?

My friends would expect me to dump her and find a woman who does want kids. But wouldn’t that be going against everything I believe in? I said I want to fall in love and form a family with someone. A man and a woman sharing their lives IS a family. And babies are not 16 inch chrome rims for the relationship. I’m happy with her and I don’t think it’s fair to either of us that she change and lose who she is because I have the more socially acceptable desires. I lose nothing by choosing her.    
  
Who am I kidding though? I am lucky as hell that she wants me and chose me. I used to be so desperate, practically anyone could have walked over and persuaded me to make them a batch of kids and then raise them. All this time knowing full well I did not even like them, let alone love them. And that’s not really happiness, it’s just misery with special effects over it.   
  
Right now we’re in Ibiza, where she’s guest DJ-ing a party and we’re at Cafe del Mar together, watching the waves break upon the shore. Here, people don’t seem to know we’re in movies or they don’t care, so we’re being left alone and everyone is respectful and friendly.    
  
She came up behind me and put her arms around my waist, resting her warm hands on my belly and rubbing gently. She kissed my neck and rested her chin on my shoulder, pulling me flush against her front.    
  
Her hands on my belly became such a wordless “I love you” between us. It’s like warmth and love are seeping into my body from her hands, filling me with colours and nice dreamlike images. At times I wonder if perhaps she does this intentionally, as another one of her arcane powers. But does it matter?    
  
At moments like these, with her, and only with her, time stretches and carves us out like a lagoon of happiness along a river of uncertainty.    
  
I no longer have to tell myself “shhh!” and there’s no substitute for the kind of peace she gives me. I may be stupid in everyone else’s book, but I think, for once, I chose pretty wisely.    
  



End file.
